Year number six

It seems the busy-ness of the summer season has caused many anniversaries and birthdays to go by without the accompanying blog post.  In this case... the birthday of Coffee Tea Books and Me!  I am now in my sixth year of putting thoughts onto screen.

CTBandMe was created when Stephanie convinced me to give blogging a try.  I had been writing a combined e-mail to Stephanie, Uncle Gibby (my sister's husband in Florida), BB (my sister-friend in Texas), and Kathy (my other sister-friend in New Mexico).  Unfortunately for them, once I began blogging I no longer had time for personal e-mails and they were often directed to "the blog".  :)

At that time, I wondered what I would write about.  Although I have written often since I learned to read (and I can't remember never having been able to read although I'm certain there were lessons), I had not committed to this kind of writing.  I had written for a "Jesus People" newspaper, and a corporation, and many Bible Studies... but never this thing called a blog.

The Sunday Afternoon Tea series was begun fairly early and I really doubted I could find something to write each week for those posts.  Here it is all these years later and I never cease to be amazed at how something pops up during the week.  This week I had a spark of inspiration when passing a construction zone (some people's brains are just wired differently... sheesh).

So much has changed since those early posts.  We were still in the midst of 24/7 homeschooling and I was spending many an evening waiting for Christopher to finish fencing (yes, as in swords) and many an hour at the Community College reading at their library... once again waiting... as we combined college classes with actual schooling at home.  I used to tell people my method of homeschooling was "Homeschooling by Waiting".

Needless to say, Christopher did not have his driver's license at the time.  He was taking a few classes at the Community College to round out our homeschool classes.  He eventually did get his license, took his senior year of high school full time at the college, spent his freshmen year of college there and then transferred to the University where he is now a senior on paper but a junior in reality.

I was adjusting to Stephanie living 1,000 miles away and she "only" had three children.  My husband was trying to get used to being on S. S. Disability and we had not lived in our home in the country very long.  Uncle Gibby would soon leave us after having lived a long life and both hubby and I were working seasonal jobs at the bookstore.

I had no idea at the start of all this that it was a good time to begin writing again.  I took many people along with me as my family made the transformation from "kid still at home" to "kids no longer at home and taking over their room as my own".  Although we still call it "Christopher's room"... much as one would put "George Washington slept here" on a door of an inn.

There are many parts of blogging I enjoy.  It gives opportunity for writers to... write... without worrying about getting published.  I leave that to my brilliant writer friends who write books.  I love meeting people I've long admired through my blog.

But most of all, I have come to love getting to know some of you as friends.  I can't imagine life without you in it, even if I don't comment often on blogs... or e-mail often... or especially snail mail often... you are in my heart and often in my prayers.  Thank you for the times you have circled the wagons around me in times of crisis and conflict and Job-like summers.  :)

Here is to year number six...

Picture: Blue Stove: allposters.com

A belated Tasha Tudor Day

Tea for two

Today was just the gentle melding of minutes into hours which I needed.  Except for one small errand this morning, the van has been parked and my hours were all my own to cook and clean and spoil Miss Victoria as she expects.  Blissful days are not those which have nothing to do but those in which I feel a little more in control of the doing.  :)

Today around noon-ish I set up tea on the deck.  Not a proper tea time with scones and dainty sandwiches but a pot of tea made from apple mint grown in our garden to be followed by a very healthy turkey and cheese sandwich on whole wheat (which does not appear in the picture).  We have come to love the apple mint tea so much, we don't mind if it takes over the herb garden (after transplanting other herbs, of course).

So... what is it about this little celebration that honors the memory of Tasha?  Well... of course there is tea time and what I have read about her love of the art of taking tea.  The flowers are just a tiny reminder of her gorgeous garden.  The Victoria magazine?  It was through Victoria that I came to learn so much about Tasha that I admired.

I have had some ask me why Tasha is one of my favorite inspirations when she in no way claims the Christan walk.  To be honest, she was a little daft in her talk about past lives and such (in which we would most likely smile and pat her on the shoulder... reminding ourselves creative people are a little odd).

But I didn't look to her for theological information or Bible study, what I admired was the way she chose to live her life.  She chose... simplicity instead of 20th century hurry... real rather than fake... handwork over mass marketed cheap imitations... gardens and country over pavement and busy streets... to stop and smell the flowers... tea time with real teapots and cups as opposed to the drive-thru at McDonald's... beauty over ashes.

I love things that are real instead of the man made Styrofoam version of life.  I am not in a position to make such an overwhelming lifestyle change but I can look at Sasha's life and choose to do those little things... the important things... to add real-ness to my life... to add Beauty and Grace and to acknowledge the "old ways" which are the "good ways"... while not giving up indoor plumbing.

Yes, some could (and do) say it was more weird than romantic the way she lived her life.  But as a person who has found myself swimming up the proverbial stream against society as a homeschooling mother... I don't think she was weird at all. 

She made a decision to live life surrounded by that which made her happy and by doing that... made those of us who love her work full of joy as we read and watch and ponder and delight in the beautiful artwork and gardens and home.

In past years I have used Tasha Tudor's birthday as a day to reflect on my own choices in life and to take time to do that which I love.  I can assure you that the time spent sitting on the deck sipping apple mint tea, eating lunch, reading Victoria and The Valley of Vision, and texting my daughter (who offered me scones and tarts vicariously)... in the rare 70 degree temperatures... with beautiful flowers and a favorite happy yellow teapot... it was pure Bliss.  (The patient went back inside to a softer seat.)

I enjoyed celebrating Tasha's birthday belatedly (I completely missed Julia Child's birthday this year due to busy-ness).  Do visit Clarice's lovely blog to see how others celebrated the day... here.

Too busy...

I am going to (finally) have my Tasha Tea Time tomorrow (Tuesday)... God willing and the creek don't rise.  How ironic it is that one of the things I admire most about Tasha is her choice of simplicity and I can't find the time to brew tea?

Just as life was getting a little calmer with our "new normal", my husband broke his collar bone and this opened an entire new normality as we had the unexpected trip to the VA Hospital and then unanticipated (but welcome) company when his brother came this weekend to help with our yard... small-ish house but big yard!

Today I had planned to spend an easy morning having coffee with a friend when an early morning cell phone call made it more complicated.  Christopher's roommate had to be taken to the ER last night after receiving an injury playing soccer. 

He accidentally left his keys in the car of the friend who took him to the hospital so he took Christopher's car this morning to work and school... which left Christopher needing a ride to his work this afternoon after his last class and a ride home from work.  Did you get all that?

So... after leaving the house at 9:00 this morning, I didn't arrive back home for good until after 5:00 and that was not in today's plan.  Hoping... really, really hoping... for a quiet day tomorrow.

Some have asked if we have our insurance settlement.  No, we haven't even received the next phone call in the process.  They said they were very far behind and I expect a hurricane was the last thing the insurance companies needed right now.  They did okay us to have the repairman come in to fix the gas line so we now have hot water and I can use our clothes dryer. 

We are still partly in the dark in some areas, especially the kitchen and are doing without the electronics which need to be replaced.  The delay has brought with it added expenses but we know the insurance company is at work.  I must admit having a desire now to follow Victoria under the bed when I hear thunder in the distance.  ;)

Thankfully, Stephanie and her family came through the hurricane with just two downed trees and a power outage.  They had prepared for the worst and had everything they needed to get by.  I am SO thankful for their safety.

Sunday Afternoon Tea

Trust in the Lord with all your heart

and lean not unto your own understanding,

In all your ways acknowledge Him

and He shall direct your path.

Proverbs 3:5-6 NKJV

Long ago and not so far away... I was fortunate to be a part of the Jesus Movement*.  It was customary at the time to pray for God to show you a "Life Verse" (I believe it is still popular with some Christians).  I should have known my life would continue to be interesting when He gave me the above verse.  I knew that was the verse for me, beyond any shadow of a doubt.

I can't tell you how many times I have meditated upon this verse, hundreds if not thousands of thoughtful ponderings through the years.  Leaning on the Reformed side of theological thought, I truly do believe God allows circumstances, people, places, etc. in our life as we continue on the path He has planned for us.  Of course, our own choices are the other side of the scale's balance.

Our summer of Job-like trial after trial sent me back to my favorite verse... my life's verse... and recently I have been thinking through each line at a time.  I thought today I'd share some of my thinking... nothing deep at all, you know.  :)

Trust in the Lord with all your heart...

When I think of this verse, I imagine myself actually jumping off a cliff into a sea of grace.  He is asking for all my heart, not just a little... not even half of it... but all my heart.  For me to find that peace above all understanding, I cannot keep any of my feelings or my thinking or my worries or even my plans wholly within myself.

I think that is where so many of us fall short of His grace.  Not unlike Ananias and Sapphira in the Book of Acts, we hold back a part of ourselves (in their case, money purchased from a sale) and try to make God think we are giving Him our all. 

Of course, He Who Created Us knows us fully and will not let us give in to self deception... for we are also and at the same time telling ourselves the same falsehood.  In the process of trials, He shakes away the thinking that we are good enough as we are.

Lean not until your own understanding...

This is most likely the one sentence in the Word that I have muttered said to myself over and over in the course of my Christian life.  It contains a real secret to walking this fallen planet with joy.  When you come to the realization that you cannot understand God's path He has chosen for you.

It is when you are trying to make sense of it all... how a loving Father would allow "this", "that", or "the other" in your life.  That is why it essential to know the entire Word of God and not pick and choose various verses (which I am afraid even many denominations tend to do!) 

Just stop trying to figure out God.  Our finite brains cannot grasp hold the concept of a Holy God and the tapestry He weaves which in the end will result in a beautiful work of art to present His Father... that being you... and me.

In all your ways acknowledge Him...

For me that means keeping Him in my thoughts, surrounding myself with favorite music and art and literature and nonfiction books by favorite writers who have the gift of leading me to the Cross... establishing an atmosphere in which acknowledging Him comes naturally.

There is a reason many great hymns of the faith take place in a garden.  As I've written before... Man was created in a garden and born of the sod.  I was on a business trip (in my former life) to San Francisco when I took the time to walk through Muir Woods before catching a red eye into Chicago.  There was something about those woods and the giant trees that calmed me and helped me hear His voice about an life changing decision I was praying about. 

Christians are not to worship nature but we can also recognize nature's cathedrals as being a gift from Him.  How easy it is to acknowledge Him in those surroundings.

Having said that... I have little corners of my own house where I find it easier to stop and listen and do some acknowledging.  Perhaps the easiest is at my kitchen sink with the aroma of 7th Generation dish washing soap arising from the hot suds, looking out the window to a forest thick with various shades of green (or the quiet white of winter).

Saints of old have transformed prison cells to sanctuaries by inviting His presence into the damp darkness.  For it is He who makes the sanctuary... not our surroundings... even if we prefer the garden.  Acknowledging Him is simply inviting His presence and His wisdom and His direction into our finite existence.

He shall direct your path...

In the NIV, this phrase is translated "He shall make straight your path".  I like both thoughts for I am often in need of direction as well as making the path in front of me more direct... it so often seems to have twists and turns and loopity-loops... in between where I am presently and my desired destination.

In the beginning of Hebrews 12, we are told that we are to look to Jesus as the "Author and Finisher" of our faith.  He is the Author of our journey, the One who wrote the plot before the beginning of time and Whom we can trust... as we acknowledge Him and walk in obedience before Him to the best of our human-ness... will help us finish well.

When I began this journey of faith in my teens, I assumed everyone finishes well.  It didn't cross my thinking that many begin the race and then drop out along the way.  Perhaps when we first signed up for this adventure, we thought of the race as a sprint and became exhausted and depressed and frustrated when we realized it was a marathon.

But if we read the Book... all of it... there should have been no surprise.  "Many are the tribulations of those who follow Him", we are told... but... "He also provides a way out, a means of escape"... from every trial, from every pit.

He promises to never leave us or forsake us.  He is running the race not by our side but within if we have asked Him to be our Lord and Savior, as the Holy Spirit... the Third Member of the Trinity... provides to us all we need for the race.

We must acknowledge Him and that it is in the Destination that that we find Heaven.  The journey is to prepare us for finish line.  :)

* The Jesus Movement was a revival in the late 60's and early 70's made up mostly of young people but I remember a few old (probably only thirty!) guys and girls, too.  Wikipedia calls it the "Christian element of the Hippie counterculture".   It was also the birthing of contemporary Christian music.  Many of those who became Christians through the Jesus Movement came from "unchurched families" (like me).

I met my husband at a Jesus People coffeehouse where I spent each weekend sharing with people about my coming to Christ and praying with people.  I was eighteen and nineteen at the time.  My future husband had just returned to college after a tour of duty in Viet Nam.

Finding purpose as a result of trials

I was just beginning to cook dinner last night when the phone ring.  It was the woman who runs the food pantry at a church in the small town where I spent most of my growing up years.  She calls my husband to let him know when they have organic produced given to them and there had been an unexpected shipment... could he quickly drive over for some food.

Being that hubby is to stay STILL now, I had to drive to the church to pick up the much welcome produce.  I always get mixed feelings when visiting the town.  On one hand, it truly is a beautiful drive and there are good memories such as the shabby chic cottage where Stephanie and her hubby were married (trust Steph to find a charming chapel) but it is also quite sad.  So many of my loved ones have passed on.

Since I had never picked up the produce, I had to ask my husband how to get there.  I had no idea it was at the church, across the street from where my sister lived when I was in elementary school.  Once I knew that, I disregarded his directions and took the back route in (as in through farm land).. passing my former high school which was packed for a football game.  Sigh... I almost felt sixteen again... but I digress.

Once at my destination, I learned how the woman who distributes the produce began her ministry.  She is a young widow who depends on food pantries and her mother is involved in ministry which receives food for pantries on a state wide level.  She finds out from her mother when there is a lot of produce and picks it up to distribute to various pantries in our area.  Her passion for feeding the poor came from her own experiences.

She and I (as well as the young woman who heads the food pantry at the church) talked about how God uses our trials to birth in us a passion for needing needs, providing information, praying for people, etc.  Both of these young women were so energetic... a side affect from serving HIM.  :)

My own interest in stocking the pantry came from my mother, who not only went through the Depression but in her thirties was left a widow with seven children (she met my father when she was around 39 or 40).  Then when we had years of limited income or no income at all due to my husband's health... stocking the pantry went from being an interest to a passion!  I lived through how a deep pantry made all the difference in the world to my family.  (I plan to repost some older pantry and recession posts in a couple of weeks.)

So...  it all gives me a sense of hope that this Job-like summer will have its' own rewards.  I know it will.

Picture: Blessings: allposters.com

A Tasha Tudor Day reminder

I think I'm having a small tea party for hubby and I as our celebration of Tasha's birthday.  That will be quite fun and I'll use apple mint grown in our own garden and do a little baking for tea treats.

I have to celebrate her birthday and write a post on Monday instead of the "official" birthday tomorrow.  We have a family member coming over Sunday afternoon when he gets out of church to mow the lawn since hubby is not to move for awhile.  Our front lawn looks like a jungle.

For more information about Tasha Tudor Day, go here.  I forgot to mention before that there are lots of comments on those posts from past years either telling how people celebrated the day or providing a link to their own blog posts.  I have had such a nice time visiting other blogs to see how people celebrated Tasha... in so many different ways.

A quiet room, hummingbirds, and the gift of dinner

I will try to take a picture soon in natural light.

This room was suppose to be a place in which to work on some creative sewing projects but has become my respite instead.  Christopher never opened the windows (as the air conditioner was always on in summer due to allergies) so I had no idea there was such a nice cross breeze.  It is a lovely, peaceful room when transformed by a pondering mother type person. Come cooler weather, I will move the laptop to the family room and start some creative projects.

I am sleeping in here for the next two weeks so my husband can find a comfortable way to sleep  (in the middle of our bed with two pillows propping him up against the headboard) and I am quite thankful we made that decision to buy a comfy mattress when Christopher was younger... even though the salesman tried to tell me boys can't tell the difference.  I knew mine would!

The John Denver Channel is playing on Pandora and James Taylor's voice and guitar can be heard coming from the speakers of the laptop... which never cease to amaze me at how good they are.  It's quite warm but nothing like the 100+ heat index yesterday.  One never knows what September will bring here... it can go from quite hot to very cold.  This year I will vote for sweater weather!  Speaking of seasonal changes...

I was talking to a friend recently who told me the most amazing story about birds in her backyard.  She keeps two or three hummingbird feeders around her property and she and her husband enjoy watching them.  A few days earlier, there was a swarm of something flying towards them.  So many she originally thought they were wasps or something but as they came nearer, they were hummingbirds... hundreds of them. 

They were there a few hours filling up on sugar water before leaving.  She hasn't seen her birds since so she's convinced they went with the birds heading south.  She was telling me this had never happened before and they have been on that property for at least twenty years or so.  The local hummingbirds usually don't leave until a few weeks from now and she's never had that many coming through at once. 

She was wondering if that was nature's way of warning us about an early winter... or something else.  (This was right after the earthquake on the east coast so she was a little antsy.)  Hmmm... I don't know about that but I must admit that I have not seen any hummingbirds on our deck for a few days now.  She lives a few miles north of our house.

Our pastor e-mailed me this morning, asking if he could bring us a catered dinner from our favorite cafeteria.  Of course I said YES!  He is just the nicest person (he and his wife).  He even apologized for having to bring the food early as he had an important event tonight.  He ended up bringing a FEAST!   There will be plenty of leftovers tomorrow.  What a blessing that was as I was still quite tired from yesterday's trip to the VA Hospital and doing laundry.  Thankfully, hubby hooked up the dryer over the weekend.

Christopher has been calling me with cooking questions, more than Stephanie ever did.  Of course, Stephanie was a good cook by the time she left home between her junior and senior year of college.  She has since surpassed her mother.  Christopher has potential, though.   His cousin (Bonnie's son) has a very high stress job but he unwinds by cooking dinner for his family each night.

The dishes are soaking (in hot water, yeah!) so I'm going to rest awhile and then my reward for a day of laundry (and after doing the dishes) will be reading a D. E. Stevenson book I brought home from the library.  We have another new normal here at the edge of the forest... another sigh... but a stack of books to read has never changed.  :)

Update about hubby

I'll be back a little later but I did want to let you know what is happening after my husband's fall night before last.

The local VA Clinic had us go to the VA Hospital (a long drive but they have the necessary equipment).  The drive there was pleasant as we passed many windmill farms which have been built in the prairie areas.  Fascinating to view!

By the time we drove home, the heat index was well over 100, we were tired, and there was a lot of construction on the highways (it IS still construction season, isn't it?).  Gosh were we glad to finally pull up in our driveway.  Our air conditioner cannot work but it was cooler than the outdoors because we are surrounded by trees.

So... the news was not so good.  He has a compound fracture of his collar bone.  He was given a sling to keep his arm and shoulder still but otherwise he is to stay on pain medication for a couple of weeks and to keep STILL.  Right, hehehe...  At least the pain is helping him remain still right now, we will see how long that lasts when he starts feeling a little better.

He's also very, very discouraged.  He had budgeted the income from his two weeks working at the bookstore and he was only able to get one day of work in before falling.  He says it is like God keeps peeling his fingers off trying to control life and is (trying) to get us to depend on Him.  Sigh...

Thank you for your prayers, my friends.

Tasha Tudor Day

I've been forgetting to post a reminder for those who enjoy participating in Tasha Tudor Day that it is coming up soon.

More information is available at Storybook Woods... here.  This link takes you to the recent reminder as well as past years' celebrations.

While I have your attention... please pray for my husband.  He fell last night and appears to have a severe shoulder injury.  We're waiting to hear back from the VA clinic to see if we have to take him to the VA Hospital (a couple hours drive away!).

Forest sounds, red trucks, and a link...

My neighbor's red pickup truck (photo 2009?)

As I sit here in my "new" room writing and thinking, both windows are open and the sounds of the forest (an interesting symphony of birds and insects and frogs) are joined together with music playing in my computer.

It is a CD I came across while cleaning out Christopher's closet... one I forgot I even owned... a music CD which accompanied a Wilderness Family video long ago.  It plays the sounds of acoustic guitar music and is quite peaceful... although what it has to do with wilderness is beyond me.

I have lived in a city surrounded by millions of people and while an interesting place to live for a couple of years, my heart belongs to the country.  I miss the forest sounds in the quietness that comes with snowfall on winter mornings.  The earliest signs of spring around here each year is when one awakens to the sound of bird songs... lovely... and the occasional noise of a car badly needing a new exhaust system on the county road... but such is life.

This morning I drove the mini-van (which Stephanie and her hubby gave us) on the scenic route into town... watching as farms and cornfields passed by the window... well, technically I was passing them!  It is still a new feel for me to drive so I was going a little slower than usual but realizing how much fun it was to sit higher than in the Buick.

Then I remembered how my "dream car" has always been a really big red pickup truck.  So... here I was driving down country roads really high up in my big red minivan.  I had to laugh when I thought of it... the homeschool mom emeritus version of the big red pickup?  :)

Speaking of said daughter, she has a lovely new blog post (am I the least bit biased?)... here.  

Sunday Afternoon Tea

Therefore, choose life... Deuteronomy 30:19 KJV

I've been thinking a lot this week about life as it is compared to life as I'd like it to be... and in a roundabout way my ponderings drifted into the subject of... managing our expectations... and then onto... choices.  I have been pondering about how we can choose our attitudes and actions regardless of our circumstances.

Here are some of my thoughts put to paper computer screen...

Choose Peace... This is not always easy for me although I do prefer living in a peaceful environment.  Sometimes it is difficult to bite my tongue and not say what I am thinking.  There are instances where it is much better to let what others have said or actions taken just go along their own way without responding.

Not about important things, of course.  There are times one must respond and stand up for what is right... but reminding your husband that he is slurping his soup for the hundredth time is not one of them.

Choose Forgiveness... My sister Bonnie and I were sipping coffee and chatting recently when the subject of a family member who had wronged others came up.  This has been so upsetting to her, she had to take sleeping pills for awhile to get to sleep.  I reminded her that as long as she was letting this upset her, the person in question continued to have control over her life.

I shared a story about my own battles with forgiving others and I think we came away with the realization one must forgive.  If only forgetting were easy... I have found one forgives long before they forget.  However, if it were impossible, He would not tell us we need to forgive before our prayers can be answered.

Choose Thankfulness...  A friend of mine once commented that she has never known anyone who has had more miracles in their life than I have.  I reminded her that... unfortunately... I have needed lots of miracles.

There are miracles such as our house not catching on fire this summer (with two opportunities) that I truly believe are Divine and our angels are watching over us.  But once in awhile answered prayer is a result of human compassion and kindness, as God whispers my name and my needs and another responds. 

Regardless of which... each day I offer thanks... throughout the day.  It is difficult for bitterness and thankfulness to live in the same heart.  This same long time friend is the one who told me, "Bren Fren (her own pet name for me), I believe God lets you go through tribulation to teach others how to go through their own Tribulation".  Hmmm... something worth pondering.

Choose Expectations... This is something I have learned over many, many years.  I was not taught to manage my expectations by parents, schools, businesses, or even the church.  But it was through years of trials and prayers and seeking to be closer to Him that I learned what is not part of the society in which we live... that over the top expectations are not a sign of success in life but instead a symptom of "Affluenza" (love that term).

I think quite often of the lovely Christmas scene in the Little House book in which the girls "open" their stockings and are thrilled with little gifts, mostly quite practical... and a small amount of candy.  Set that scene aside the typical Western Christmas morning with gifts piled high around a tree and when those are open there is a wild scramble to see if there is... more.

How much better it has become to realize more is not necessarily better.  To learn the difference between need and a few godly desires as compared to a life of excess... well, it has been a learning process and I'm still working on that with some collections.  But I think you understand the difference as you learn to find joy in less.  Which brings me to...

Choose Simplicity...  Which in many ways is about managing expectations... ours and our children as they grow up in our home.  To teach a child the joys of simple living is an heirloom more valuable than any jewels or gold or mansion.

A person who has learned to live simply is already rich.  It is not easy in the society we live in today.  It takes more thought and prayer and standing firm on convictions to simplify our life than it does to become part of the flow of society.

I think true simplicity can be different with each person and within each family.  But we all know... if we truly stop and ponder... what a simpler life means to each of us.

Choose Reality...  What?  Choose reality... where did that come from?  Well, it's kind of a part of my ponderings about simplicity.  My first choice would be to live on a small farm and grow all my own veggies and raise chickens and perhaps even live off the grid.  Simple does not always equate easy!

My reality is my small garden - less than an acre - place in the country with a naughty kitty to keep in line is all I can handle.  I suppose there is a fine line between asking in faith and accepting our present reality.  But I think most of us tend to know what reality we find ourselves in... but never stop praying for miracles.  :)

Choose Beauty...  Mankind was born in a garden and our hearts have longed for Perfection since Eden.  We need that which is beautiful as much as we need oxygen but few truly understand... except the artists and poets and musicians... and saints... those whose very lives brings them close to God.

There is no circumstance in which we live that cannot be made better by surrounding ourselves with what we find beautiful... not expensive... beautiful.

Living a beautiful life is nothing short of an adventure as we think of ways to bring that which is lovely into our home and garden and surroundings within our budget. To have something beautiful to look at... to hear... to eat... to smell... to read... to watch... to touch... what more can we ask for?

When we lived in a very ugly neighborhood after a huge financial reversal (brought about by my husband's extended illness), I put an old bench under the kitchen window and placed inexpensive flowers on it.

There was a wreath at the door and when one entered our small townhouse there were often delicious aromas coming out of the kitchen.  Our very humble environment was filled with our favorite inherited furniture and our pictures and the stuff that said... home.

Circumstances were far from perfect... not quite what I would even call good... but when we walked into our home from the outside world there was an environment in which to hope and to pray and to believe in miracles... and indeed the miracles arrived.

Choose Order... It is difficult for me to see beauty or find peace when there is no order.  I don't mean the lovely lived in look of a home filled with creative people (I keep piles in baskets to hide my creativity, hehehe).

I mean a house filled with too much unneeded stuff and tripping over the same clothes on the floor for days and dishes not done in the sink kind of clutter (all of which has happened in my own home!).

With Christopher's room all nice and orderly and mine... I turned my attention to our garage this past week.  I am sorry to say it has looked like an episode of Hoarders as I awaited my husband to begin working on it as he had promised.

However, the realization came to me that it was going to continue to be low on his priority list and to be honest... I think it was overwhelming to the ADHD side of his mind (Christopher also has to have help when his room gets too messy... it has something to do with a lack of sorting skills).  Especially as this year's high mold counts have affected both the guys adversely.

So... I decided I would at least get started and within three or four days I now have half the garage cleaned up... most of what I can do alone.  It was hard and uncomfortable and hot and sweaty and I felt miserable and there were spiders and spider webs and did I mention I felt MISERABLE?  But there came that moment after a day or two when I could see the results and that energized me to keep going.

Order is not always easy in a world which leans toward becoming unorderly but it is possible. Of course, it is also more difficult with little children around as one who has stepped on their share of Lego's knows.  ;)

Choose Life...  Life truly is a choice.  We are constantly choosing between life and death as we choose how we act and think and react and what we DO.  There is usually a choice available.  If we choose the emotions and actions which bring anger and bitterness and unhappiness and bad feelings... then we should not be surprised when what we receive in return is any less.

But if we choose life giving actions and words and reactions... we will, in turn... receive life.  Joy may not be immediate but joy follows life giving actions.  We choose our words.  We choose what we think upon.  We choose the books we read, media we watch and listen to, friends we surround ourselves with, experts we trust, and generally all that makes up our life.

We even choose our reactions to what we did not choose... our parents, our siblings, our health, etc.  I am convinced God places us in the families where He wants us... and the towns he wants us... and around the people in which we are to interact... to mold us and shape us into the person He wants us to be and... to pray for, and take care of, and influence those in our own little world.

Choose Hope... as Churchill so famously said, "Never, Never, Never, Never give up".  You never know if you are just five minutes away from a miracle.  I said that part, not Churchill.

Choose Jesus... Peace is not a feeling... Peace is a Person.  I am trying each day to make choosing Jesus the most important part of my day but I admit to failure quite often as the urgent overtakes the important in my days.

I have favorite devotional books, my Bible, etc. where they are easily available in the midst of busy days.  There are a few favorite radio and TV Bible teachers I listen to from time to time.

But most of all I talk to Him throughout the day... quite often in the form of HELP!

Longing for normal...

Gosh, will I ever be happy when things return to some resemblance of normal around here.  Of course, there is never such a thing as real normal, is there?  "Life happens" is normal for us.  :)

The hours and days and weeks are just flying by this summer.  I have ideas for some pantry posts as well as e-mails to answers and snail mail to write.  I've decided to type out a few letters instead of hand writing as I'd intended... a typed letter is far better than none as I wait for more hours in my day.

Our insurance company gave us permission to have our gas pipe repaired before the rest of the claim goes through.  The repairman was here earlier today and the representative of the gas company just came to check the repairs and turn on the gas to our yard (and in our house). 

As it turns out, he could not turn on the gas going into our dryer (but the hot water heater is working!).  Not only was there a hole in the gas pipe (which was just replaced) but there was a hole and burn marks in another object going into our dryer... cannot remember what it is called.

The gas company representative told us over and over that 1) he doesn't know why our house did not burn down with the initial direct lightening hit and 2) why it did not explode and/or burn down with not only one pipe leaking gas (and flames) but this other object, too.  I don't know if he is a person of faith but he called it a miracle.  My husband has to make the repair to the dryer before we can turn that gas on.

Unfortunately, the quick fix we hoped would repair the fan in our furnace did not work so that means we will have to have the repairman back again (more expense) before the air conditioner can work.  He looked at it when he was here to fix the pipe and was hoping just oiling the fan would solve the problem and if it didn't, he would have to make a service call later just for the fan.

As I type, I have the two windows in the room open and Miss Victoria has squeezed herself onto the ledge of one of the windows.  I'm not sure if she is there for the breeze or trying to get a look at the neighbor's dog. I've decided even if it is hot, it is a whole lot better to have the furnace fan break down in summer rather than sub-zero wind chills!

Every time I start to get frustrated at the inconveniences surrounding my days, I think of those families who lost houses and loved ones in the fires, floods, and storms.  Our insurance representative apologized about how long this settlement is taking and explained they are very far behind due to all the bad weather this year.  He has been SO nice, though.

Then there is that whole miracle thing.  Who can complain?  Especially when one now has hot water.  :)

Picture:  Yes, I LOVE that cabinet.  The vintage sewing machine was cut out of its' original cabinet and has been happily sitting on this one for years now.  The folk art tree was found by Stephanie at a New England tag sale and sent this way... perfect!

Thoughts on new rooms, dresses, and the need for a nap

Her Highness showing off her pretty face

Thank you for your kind comments about my "new" room.  I think it was Vee that noticed the corner of the bed in one picture.  Yes, Christopher's bed is still here as is his bookshelf (both on the other side of the room).  In the second phase of the room transformation next year, we will "tweak" that side of the room... when he takes his bed and books.

This corner shelf is suppose to hold a TV but now shows off "pretties"

In the meantime... and so as not to push my son into a need for counseling on abandonment issues... he still has a place to sleep on those rare evenings he will be at home.  :)

I thought you might like the (computer) wallpaper I've used for ages and ages now.  It calms my soul and brings peace.  It is but one of many wallpapers offered by Revive Our Hearts ministry... here.  They are all so beautiful and inspiring but this one has been my favorite.

I'm not sure it is available right now but if you like it, you can request them to add "Stability... The Lord shall be the stability of your times" back to their offerings.  They did it for us before after a computer crash (VERY nice people to work with).

I listen to Revive Our Hearts on the Moody Channel.

It has been so very busy here, not at all like I enjoy home life.  It's just one of those times of the year where multiple appointments and commitments are scheduled one right after the other.  Which is how the subject of dresses arises... in a somewhat roundabout way.

My three month A1C appointment (that is diabetic speak) was yesterday at the clinic and I wore one of my favorite short sleeve summer dresses.  It's just easier for the blood pressure cuff and the taking of blood and checking of pulses and all of that to be accomplished.  The dress has the prettiest lilac flowers and is so comfortable that I decided to wear it for all of my errands.

Now, my usual summer errand attire is a pair of Capri slacks and pretty blouse so it's not like I'm dressed badly when I go out but there is just something about the way we are treated when we wear a dress (or long flowing skirt with a pretty top).  I'm not sure if it is the way we look or the way a pretty dress makes us feel (or most likely both) but I find people treat me better when I'm wearing a dress than even the nicest slacks outfit.

When I was growing up and the nice department stores were mostly downtown (there was one in a shopping center), ladies would not think of shopping without being dressed up.  I don't remember ever "going shopping" at one of those stores in jeans when I was very young.  This was also the days when the nice stores had tea rooms, we had one downtown and one at the department store in the shopping center (The Mall wasn't built until my teen years).

My mother always told me to dress up when I was shopping and to notice how much more attentive sales people were.  While I was not at a high end department store but only Kroger's and Wal Mart... it really was true.  At least it seemed that way.  Sigh... somehow the Subway store just doesn't replace the tea room.

Well, for all people were quite nice yesterday... it has still been a tiring three days. I was driving from the busy streets of town to our home in the country today... realizing there was no way everything could be accomplished by the end of the afternoon... reminding myself that at one time I combined a full time career with being a full time wife and mom and church volunteer and primary cook and bottle washer.  God definitely gives grace for the season we are in at the time!

All I could think of was how much I needed a nap but that wasn't going to happen.... yawn.  I can see an early bedtime tonight.  :)

My "new" room

While the transformation of this room will be ongoing for awhile, I am quite pleased with the way it looks right now.  There is a little distortion with the colors, using a flash is a must when you live surrounded by a forest.  :)

This room is actually the Master Bedroom for the house.  When we moved in six years ago, Christopher had a lot more stuff (mainly technology) than we did so we chose the mid-size room as our bedroom.

His former dresser now holds my favorite things as well as fabric now stored in a few of the drawers.  His things are all packed in the closet.

The antique cabinet above holds stationary, candles, etc. as it did before.  Moving it in here allowed us to make the dining table larger in the dining area.

 

This corner has also been made "all mine" with its' pictures, stack of pretty books to peruse, as well as a favorite dried flower arrangement.  It is not nearly as white as it appears using the flash on the camera!

Someone else has found her own space, too.  :)

It's nice having a permanent home for the laptop.  I plan to once again get started on the Recommendation List... as soon as things calm down a bit here.

Note:  All pictures can be enlarged by clicking on them.

Sunday Afternoon Tea

To everything there is a season,

and a time to every purpose under heaven.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-3

If all the summer days were like yesterday, it would have been a glorious summer!  Instead, I once again noticed (as I was walking the gravel lane to the county road for my morning paper) that the forest is as thick as I've ever seen it before.  The wet spring and extremely hot summer provided just the right conditions for dense growth, so much so that one cannot see into the forest!  It's rather spooky...

However, there are little hints of nature here and there telling me we are near the end of one season and the beginning of another.  My garden looks pathetic, although promising to provide tomatoes for some time to come.  The hanging basket on my porch should be put out of its' misery and taken to the compost pile but I don't have the heart to do so with a few colorful flowers hanging on.

The streets in town are crowded with U-Haul trucks and trailers, traffic is much heavier, and the grocery stores are packed.  All signs... even for the most unobservant among us... that the University is rising from its' summer slumber.  Although it never really sleeps with summer school and continuous research... there is a nice summer slowdown feel during May, June, and July and one can actually find a parking place in front of the library.

Nature has me pondering seasons, as well as the changes here at home.  We are most definitely in the empty nest season now but I am surprisingly calm and ready for it.  Not so much last year when Christopher moved out to live on campus for the first semester.  But this August it is different and we are all filled with grace and anticipation as it is time for him to go out on his own, especially with a wedding coming up in May.  He also lives fifteen minutes away.  :)

My husband remarked not just a few times this past week that I am letting no moss grow under my feet as I transformed Christopher's room but I have had ideas running through my mind for weeks now.  It also gave me an opportunity to do something within my power to organize, straighten, box up, put away, and then create... with so much of the rest of the house in waiting mode for the insurance settlement.

So many parts of my life are changing with this transition... from the way the house looks to my cooking habits.  Last night I made a crustless quiche for dinner, which hubby and I enjoyed very much.  It's one of those meals Christopher does not care for (which I have yet to understand as he likes eggs in about any other form).  Since he is no longer coming home for lunch, those menus are also being tweaked.  I don't make less for most evening meals... we like leftovers.  ;)

I was pondering this week how it is just as silly to get all upset over the season we are living in life as it would be to wish away summer for autumn (believe me, I tried in the 110 heat index!).  There is the good and ummm... not so good... in each season of life.  Every sleep deprived mother of preschoolers most likely dreams of the season in which kids sleep late... I did. 

Older women told me the years go fast and to appreciate each day.  Having lost a parent very early in life, I knew that our years can be brief.  There were many times I made mental pictures of favorite family times but even then it seemed as though the days moved slowly but the years went by at the speed of light.  It must be a mother's perception of time and space and Physics.

There are fond memories of my daughter's childhood years and then later homeschooling my son but I also enjoy seeing the young woman and young man they became... not to mention incredibly intelligent and well behaved grandchildren.  Okay, they are smart and their parents are working on that well behaved part.

Sometimes I pass the trails where Christopher and I spent many a summer day hiking and collecting for our nature studies (a must with Charlotte Mason, you know).  These days I couldn't make it up the first hill, although I would love to have the opportunity to once again picnic in the nearby park with both "kids" (their father hates eating outdoors, I think he experienced enough of it as a soldier in Viet Nam). 

Perhaps next year when the family meets for Christopher and Miss M.'s wedding but even then a picnic at the park will be different.  Instead of my children running around the play area and looking for arrowheads on the dry creek bottom, it will be grandchildren.  Although I'll still be on the lookout for snakes.  :(

But that is all just fine.  I have learned to not only accept this season but to embrace it in all its limitations and fullness.  I can't say it was easy at first for transitions are never easy for me.  I once told a blog friend that our 40s are our transition years when we leave the last bloom of youth at age 39 and end up in true middle age at 50... it is our attitude toward the changes that determine what the next season will be like. 

I am convinced I could not have come to enjoy this next season if I had not been willing to accept it and even appreciate it for what it is.

I have written many times that my word this year is create.. after multiple years in which my word was hope.  While hope is still very important, it was the acceptance of this season (and all its' limitations) in which a return to create was birthed. 

Once again learning (over and over through the decades) to appreciate that season in which I am living... not looking back with romantic memories of special days... not looking forward with apprehension... but living right now and in this moment... the gift of today.

Life is not what I expected it to be in this season of life.  Developing a chronic illness took me completely by surprise!  I thought once the homeschool years were behind us, I would become a pastry chef, or a caterer, or at least work in a cute bookstore somewhere.

Instead I have to depend on Him for all extra provision (with even part-time work at the college bookstore now too tiring) but I have also learned there is a lot one can do just a little at a time.  It's amazing, really, and this season even provides a room in which to create.

Perhaps I'll start with a box of crayons...

In the cool of the morning

Clearanced flowers from WalMart

I am finally at a point where I feel a little more in control (although almost afraid to say that in case one of the appliances hears what I have stated and blows a gasket).  It has been a difficult couple of months as the gotta do's of life clashed with the wanna don'ts of a low energy level.  As with most women, the list of things to do prevailed and I dropped into bed each night exhausted but with the knowledge more had been accomplished that day.

One thing about the challenge of sorting and packing and putting away and then creating afresh is that one can actually see their accomplishment each day.  Unlike the exhaustion which comes from raising hyperactive little boys in which it can take years to see the wonderful results of doing the same things and saying the same things and wondering if they will ever "get it"... now, of course, realizing he did.  :)

As I write, I am sitting at my makeshift desk in my new room, formerly Christopher's bedroom.  The morning air is unusually cool for this summer's constant heat waves but I am enjoying having the windows open as the sounds of the forest (as well as morning breezes) make their way into the room.  I will take pictures later today but I can tell you already... it is worth all the blood muscle aches, sweat, and tears.

A room to create and to think and to ponder and to write!  Not perfect by any means as I'm using the table from the deck (used to serve food buffet style on the 4th of July)... albeit covered with a vintage tablecloth.  Christopher's bookshelf with all of his books takes up a large section of wall but also reminds me of him.  The remainder of his stuff... all packed away in the closet of this room until he needs them someday.

But I am also now surrounded by favorite furniture and pictures and some of my books... the family room and living room appear almost Zen-like in their simplicity as items disappeared from their shelves and walls to make their way here.  My husband... who prefers almost nothing as decoration and has lived with my combination of English Country and American Primitive... is also happy.

Well, I should mention there continues to be fried electronics stacked in the living room and family room awaiting the settlement with our insurance company and a check to restore all that does not work and replace electronics.  We cannot get rid of the fried electronics until it is settled.  So we continue to live with limited lights and no hot water but one does get used to the new normal (especially with the knowledge it will all be set right someday).

I didn't mention that our air conditioner quit last week, which we were concerned about when the heat wave kept it going day and night (and we keep it as high as possible to conserve energy).  Since the problem is actually in the furnace fan, the guy who will be fixing our gas lines will fix it when the repair money arrives.  In the meantime, we are thankful for cooler (comparative) days.

I thought I'd share the above picture, which shows what the kitchen lights look like after the lightening strike.  They exploded over me!  How I thank God continually for His protection during the actual strike and the gas build up days later. 

Morning light on silver...

I've wanted to change the look of the buffet for awhile and when Manuela had a post displaying her silver... here... it was all the encouragement needed.

Out came the silver polish and in one of those If You Gave a Mouse a Cookie kind of moments where one thing led to another... I decided to change everything but the silk flowers.

It looks a little like it did when my husband first brought home the buffet from his sister's place.  Everything displayed came from Goodwill, thrift stores, garage sales, and the silver set was a very inexpensive find at an antique mall about five or six years ago.  It actually came with a different silver tray which is really, really big.  By using the smaller silver tray, I have room for other pretty items.  I keep the larger tray for some future tea party.

I'm always surprised at how inexpensive one can purchase silver while thrifting.  One of my other talented decorating genius type friends just wrote about purchasing silver at an auction... here.  Tracey McBride is the author of two of my all time favorite books for inspiring my creativity... Frugal Luxuries and Frugal Luxuries by the Seasons.

Everything continues to be rather topsy turvey-upside down-inside out here but we are making progress.  I'm working on Christopher's room to make it mine (first packing away what is his) and we're waiting to hear from the insurance company.  As I wrote a friend today, I have such new respect for 18th Century homemakers.  :)

Sunday Afternoon Tea

In the midst of chaos, the thoughts I've been pondering this week have to do with The Fellowship of the King.  No, I am not mixing my Tolkien titles.  Instead I have been thinking about the fellowship we... who are united in our decision to follow our Lord and King... enjoy whether we know each other in person or only through the various technologies available at this moment of time.

These rather happy ponderings were sparked by sad news, the passing away of one of my long time Internet friends.  We knew Penney as Tinger... one of the original ladies in our Christian women's forum whose friendship found its' genesis in the emergency preparedness site of the late 1990s.  Tinger experienced a battle with cancer for over a decade with such bravery and grace.

A very proud Canadian, we always laughed how she could trump any of our complaints about brutal winter weather in the "Lower 48" with her tales of -50 wind chills and recent twenty foot snowfalls.  She will be missed but all her friends are relieved to know her days of pain are now behind her.

I started thinking how tears could be shed for a friend I've never met in person and how lovely friendships have developed over the years with people I have only spent time with through the technology of the computer.

A handful of us have met in person as our paths crossed over the years and with some there have been the occasional telephone call.  At times we have shared handwritten letters and cards... but mostly e-mails, forums, blogs, and all other sources of technology which utilize mouse, keyboard, and monitor.

I remember somewhere in my reading... I think it was Ravi Zacharias' autobiography... where he talked about that odd feeling one finds coming upon them when sitting in a busy airport or at a table in a crowded coffee shop and instinctively feeling a connection with another person.  As a conversation is begun and questions asked, one finds the other to be a fellow follower of Christ and the attraction to another was that of the Holy Spirit who lives within all who follow Him.

I've had that experience before, which is most likely why that passage of words jumped from the book into my memory!   It was as if a total stranger was a long lost relative with instant fellowship between us as we talked and listened and listened and talked... instant friends who perhaps will know each other for years and years or may only chat until it is time to pick up a child from their fencing lesson or be on time for an English class.

I have been asked numerous times why I believe blogs are so popular and their numbers are now in the millions.  I know there are many reasons but one I find over and over in my own little corner of Blogdom is the joy that comes with finding those who understand us... some who enjoy the same style of decorating, or cooking, or sewing, or homeschooling, or simpler lifestyles, or pets, or books, or tea time... etcetera.

But also the Fellowship of the followers of the King... fellow brothers and sisters in Christ from all parts of the world.  What is that line of C. S. Lewis in Shadowlands?  "We read to know we are not alone."

How very true in this place of time and history... and we feel that fellowship with other believers through land lines and DSL and satellites and all other modern forms of taking this amazing vehicle of communication to all the world... and some become very, very special friends.

I really am still here

Ever since the lightening strike and subsequent gas line near miss (I still find that a miracle), it seems like life has been turned upside down.  Add to that classes are starting soon so this weekend is when Christopher moves to his own apartment near campus which.... for the most part... means he is moving out for good!... I barely have time to breath.

He is moving most of his things out and leaving behind what there is no room for at the apartment.  He will take the rest of his belongings next spring when he gets married.  However, my instructions were for him to take as much as possible now so I can begin the transformation of his former room.  ;)

My sister, Bonnie, asked me if I was going to have a difficult time letting go.  I think she was shocked when I said something like absolutely not!  I went through all of that last year this time when he was moving out to live on campus (but then moved back for the second semester).  Anyway... he lives near campus... about fifteen minutes from our house.

Miss M. came over on Tuesday to help sort through his "stuff" (and helped him assemble three garbage bags to throw out) and I have been sorting through kitchen items for him to take... those I had been saving and a few Goodwill finds we came across. 

He and I are to continue going through his closet as I talk him into help him decide what can be given to charity.  The way he gets attached to stuff, I wouldn't be surprised to see him on Hoarders someday, except he is marrying a compulsive cleanie (hehehe).

Everything still looks upside down here, too.  We are hoping to get the final paperwork into the insurance agency tomorrow.  There is a phrase I have told myself over and over in the past when I've been in the midst of a trial or chaos... This too shall pass.  I keep thinking of cooler days ahead with my kitchen once again light and cozy and a nice pot of soup simmering on the stove and no fried appliances littering the rooms.  :)

I do plan to be here on Sunday and I should be back to regular chatting soon.  There are also letters to write, (I am so sorry for those I owe a letter!), and books to read, etc.