Better than a Hallelujah

I was driving down the country road a few weeks ago, K-Love playing on the loud side since I was all alone... and in the country... with the windows down.  :)

When... this song began.

I rolled the windows up to better hear the words and found I had goosebumps as I turned onto the gravel lane to my home.  Love this song!  (Lyrics are below the YouTube video.)

Better than a Hallelujah

God loves a lullaby
In a mothers tears in the dead of night
Better than a Hallelujah sometimes.
God loves the drunkards cry,
The soldiers plea not to let him die
Better than a Hallelujah sometimes.

We pour out our miseries
God just hears a melody
Beautiful the mess we are
The honest cries of breaking hearts
Are better than a Hallelujah.

The woman holding on for life,
The dying man giving up the fight
Are better than a Hallelujah sometimes
The tears of shame for what's been done,
The silence when the words won't come
Are better than a Hallelujah sometimes.

  We pour out our miseries
God just hears a melody
Beautiful the mess we are
The honest cries of breaking hearts
Are better than a Hallelujah.

Better than a church bell ringing
better than a choir singin' loud
singin' loud

Note:  This video was made by a fan of Amy Grant who heard about it and asked the record company to allow it to stay on YouTube.  After watching it, one can understand.

The Beatles, the Beach Boys, and the soundtrack of our lives

I've been enjoying reading all kinds of comments recently. (The Hobbit House post will continue taking comments, well... so can everything else since they all come to me to moderate.) :)

I love the comment reminding me of... Mr. Conductor!!! Why didn't I think of that? Christopher loved Thomas the Train Engine, especially the original episodes with Ringo. So, I know I'm not a complete failure as a homeschooling mother because I do remember telling him about the Beatles at that time. He doesn't remember. Of course, he also doesn't remember any of the grammar and sentence structure we studied during that time either.

There were two instances last week I asked him who his homeschool teacher and why she didn't teach him the important things of life. One was the said conversation about music, if I remember the other was about movies. Obviously we needed to review curriculum, perhaps we should have added "20th Century Culture"???

Although, we did chat yesterday about "what group or person was the musician of a particular decade" in the 20th century. I remembered reading it was Frank Sinatra in the 40s, Elvis in the 50s, the Beatles in the 60s (although I'd split that decade and pick The Beach Boys the first part of it and the Beatles the second... but whoever made the list didn't ask my opinion), John Denver represented the 70s and I think it was Garth Brooks for the 90s.

I couldn't remember who represented the 80s but Christopher thought it would be Michael Jackson (whose only song I liked was Rockin' Robin and even then I preferred the 1950s version).

Going back to the Beatles... imagine going through life and not knowing the haunting lyrics to Yesterday, or Something, or the delightful When I'm Sixty-four. Then there are all their songs just made for philosophical debate... like Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds... as in... what were they smoking when they wrote this... catchy beat, though.

While a certain nineteen year old says he doesn't know who the Beach Boys are, he has certainly heard their music in this house. Guess he didn't associate the name with the song... sigh. How many times has he heard his father sing Help Me Rhonda and ask that very important historical question... was it the Beach Boys or Jan and Dean who sang Little GTO?

Although hubby and I were not raised in the same town (we just barely went to high school in the same decade), we had one thing in common... summers with our radio tuned to WLS in Chicago! I think it's now talk radio all day but back then it was.... magic. It was a different time and place when the radio was king (and the music was, for the most part, clean).

You do notice there was no confusion over John Denver... or Elvis? Other favorites like Johnny Cash (whose songs tell the soul of America) should be well known in this house. Having been raised by Southern parents, my nostalgia is definitely found in the already mentioned Johnny and the music of Willie Nelson.

My mother-in-law hated country music but she owned Willie's Stardust album... what's not to love? Then there is the cowboy music of George Strait and Marty Robbins or the angelic bluegrass songs of Alison Krause.

It all has to be the fault of those ear plugs. When Stephanie was home, the house was filled with music. Steph was our song bird and she had (has) the loveliest voice. Christopher tells people there's a reason his original i-pod songs were mostly show tunes and contemporary Christian music from the 1990s... the influence of his big sister.

There was the year she was in a chorus that performed Beauty and the Beast. I wonder if Christopher remembers her singing the entire musical to him over and over when he was little. We did have a cassette player but who needed it when we had his sister at home?

So... all this to say it's all the fault of those ear buds and earphones and having our songbird move away. No one wants to hear me sing. I haven't a clue why...

May we wax poetic over the music of our youth... we haven't even gone down the road of Yo Yo Ma, yet... or the Carpenter's... or the Fifth Dimension... or the music of the Jesus People... or Frank and Dean... sigh.

I know there are wonderful contemporary Christian and Gospel songs as well as the "old hymns of the faith" but sometimes I just love to hear the best the secular market has to offer. That music which is lovely (at least to individual preference), not that which defiles the imagination.

While writing this, I remembered a post written back in 2006 where I pondered "music, technology, and the soundtrack of my life". It can be found here...

At the top of the Play List

I moved one of my favorite songs to the top of the Play List. If it is too loud for you, remember you can turn off the music or click on the title of a quieter song.

The instructions are located just above the Play List.

I needed the words...

"Bring The Rain"

I can count a million times
People asking me how I
Can praise You with all that I've gone through

The question just amazes me
Can circumstances possibly
Change who I forever am in You

Maybe since my life was changed
Long before these rainy days
It's never really ever crossed my mind
To turn my back on you, oh Lord
My only shelter from the storm
But instead I draw closer through these times

So I pray

Bring me joy, bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory

And I know there'll be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus, bring the rain

I am Yours regardless of
The dark clouds that may loom above
Because You are much greater than my pain

You who made a way for me
By suffering Your destiny
So tell me what's a little rain

So I pray

Holy, holy, holy
Is the Lord God Almighty

Finishing well

Sorry I didn't get a chance to post any information about the menu for the open houses (past and present). A friend of ours passed away Saturday evening and we just found out last night that his funeral was to be held today. It still amazes me to see the difference between the funeral of a strong believer and one who... isn't. Although there were a lot of tears at today's funeral, there was also hope... and laughter... and the knowledge we would meet our friend again.

He had committed his life to Christ late in life and was miraculously able to walk away from a lifetime abuse of alcohol. We didn't know that he and his wife had divorced at one time due to his drinking. As he changed (for the better), they ended up getting remarried a few years before they moved here to be closer to their daughter and her family. He had battled cancer eight years ago and his health had not been good since then but he lasted years longer than doctors ever expected.

Our pastor talked about G. and how he had "finished well". His transformation had started in his late 50s, much later than most in our church. However, in his last years... especially the last ten years which those present had known him... he had been a man who was a friend and father not only to his own but to many people. He was a wonderful grandfather. He had grown in his study of the Word, and in allowing God to love those who are not too lovely through him... for he had walked that path before and knew miracles were possible.

I want to finish well. I read a book a few years ago that said only 50% of those making a decision to follow Christ actually end their life as a committed Christian. I can understand, of course. Life comes at you hard at times... many times. I've mentioned here before about the many mornings I awoke and was quite sad He hadn't taken me Home during the night. Life was way too difficult and my trials so heartbreaking that I had to remind myself to breath.

Life is still hard. However, I look back now and know He truly was carrying me through those times. He did make an escape, just as He promises in the Word. I understand those Scriptures which talk about faith... patience... experience... and hope. Once you have gone around the mountain a few times, you begin to know that hope is possible because you've gone that route before. You will draw strength from His Word because it is True.

When we were leaving the funeral home, my husband told me that was the best funeral he had ever been to because it gave him hope. He was twelve years younger than our friend. There was hope his best days were still ahead. :)

We sung some great songs at the funeral. One was a chorus we sang a lot at church which I'll end this post with. However, I was reminded again of the song I've told my family I want sung at my funeral. It's not super spiritual. It isn't even "Christian". It is a song I have on my Play List because it makes me smile and I have said for years it is the PERFECT funeral song... I Can See Clearly Now. Stop to think of it. When could we better say those words than when we see into Eternity and no longer are "looking through a glass darkly". :)

Here are the words of the ending song (chorus) at our friend's Home Going today.

Who Am I?

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt?

Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wand'ring heart?

Chorus

Not because of who I am,
But because of what You've done;
Not because of what I've done,
but because of who You are;

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
a vapor in the wind;

Still You hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling;
And you've told me who I am...
I am Yours!

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again?

Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me?

Picture: Building Memories; J. Sorenson; available at allposters.com

When I need an anchor

I'll be drawing a number from a bowl (as opposed to a rabbit out of a hat) this evening! So, if you are reading this in the daytime on Monday... there is still time to make a comment on my previous post.

I have this picture (much larger, of course) hanging up in my formal dining area. It is one of my favorites. I remember when it was purchased, to hang in the big formal living room of our larger home. I had been going through one of the hardest struggles and trials of my life... not caused by health issues or finances (although they had cropped up before and after that time). No, the trial that had sent me to my knees... on the floor... with the Book of Psalms open... (can you see why I loved this artwork?)... was caused by betrayal from people whom I once called friends.

The grief I felt was overwhelming. A couple of years later, I was able to see how I'd opened myself up for their slander campaign. I don't believe I deserved it at all but I know why they did it. Having been in positions of high visibility in the corporate world and in the church, I had known fiery verbal arrows before and I usually was able to "consider the source". This time, when the source was people I never expected to do this, the hurt was overwhelming.

I did come away with a lesson, once I had healed enough to ask God to show me what I could have done differently. I remember it quite often now... "even though you have an opinion, it doesn't mean you have to give it". I can't tell you how many time through the years that has stopped me from opening my mouth or sending out a wordy e-mail. Not that learning a lesson made what they did right, far from it.

It's just that old saying I go by... to never waste a trial. Okay God, if I'm going to cry myself to sleep for months and months... then teach me something in this. He does... He did... He still teaches when I ask.

There was a song I listened to over and over, practically wore out a CD! This is it... The Anchor Holds by Ray Boltz. It truly was my anchor (and yes, I did spend months kneeling on my living room carpeting in agonizing prayer... just like the picture).

The Anchor Holds... then and now. We truly do hear Him best when we need Him most.

I have journeyed
Through the long, dark night
Out on the open sea
By faith alone
Sight unknown
And yet His eyes were watching me

CHORUS:
The anchor holds
Though the ship is battered
The anchor holds
Though the sails are torn
I have fallen on my knees
As I faced the raging seas
The anchor holds
In spite of the storm

Ive had visions
Ive had dreams
Ive even held them in my hand
But I never knew
They would slip right through
Like they were only grains of sand

CHORUS
The anchor holds
Though the ship is battered
The anchor holds
Though the sails are torn
I have fallen on my knees
As I faced the raging seas
The anchor holds
In spite of the storm

I have been young
But I am older now
And there has been beauty
That these eyes have seen
But it was in the night
Through the storms of my life
Oh, that's where God proved
His love to me

Listening for God in the Wal Mart parking lot

When You lead me to the valley of vision

I can see You in the heights
And though my humbling wouldn't be my decision
It's here Your glory shines so bright
So let me learn that the cross precedes the crown
To be low is to be high
That the valley's where You make me more like Christ

Let me find Your grace in the valley
Let me find Your life in my death
Let me find Your joy in my sorrow
Your wealth in my need
That You're near with every breath
In the valley

In the daytime there are stars in the heavens
But they only shine at night
And the deeper that I go into darkness
The more I see their radiant light
So let me learn that my losses are my gain
To be broken is to heal
That the valley's where Your power is revealed.

I am always fascinated by the places I hear the still, small voice of God.

I haven't had the pleasure recently of quiet mornings sitting on my porch with my Bible...or evenings on the sofa with my eyes closed and listening to great music.

However, yesterday evening...after the three older children were asleep...my daughter and I made a Wal Mart run for such important travel items as disposable diapers. I have been sitting in the car with the AC running for days, usually listening to children's praise tapes or Veggie Tales.

However, yesterday evening she was playing a CD which had been a gift from her husband for Christmas. It is called the Valley of Vision and it is absolutely beautiful. It's based on the Valley of Vision puritan book (which I know many of us love). The song above is the first on the CD, which I found myself playing over and over.

I enjoyed the coolness of the car on a very hot day and the music filling the van and I heard that still, small Voice. I felt His presence...in the parking lot...at Wal Mart. Even the baby went to sleep at the sound of the music.

It wasn't until Amarillo by Morning played on my cell phone that the quiet was interrupted with a call from my teenage son, driving home from a class. I told him where I was and within a few minutes, he had driven up and parked near to me. Ironically, he was near the Wal Mart entrance on the Highway when he had phoned. I always enjoy seeing those I love in unexpected places. :)

If you are interested in hearing excerpts from the CD, you can go here.

I found a review on Challies site, which is quite good, too.

I'll be back on Sunday for Afternoon Tea...God willing and the creek don't rise.

Sunday Afternoon Tea

Let's talk...classical music...wait, don't go to the next blog...stay with me!

Actually, I was originally thinking of something else to chat about when...a few days ago...I found myself driving down the longer (and faster) of the two roads that lead to my home in the country.

For you see, I had been standing in the sun for nearly two hours and...the air conditioner in my car has not worked for a few years now. Windows rolled down, going 50 mph on a country road...instant air conditioner! But I digress...

I was hot and tired so the three Christians channels on my radio didn't appeal to me. There is a time and place for good preaching but this wasn't one of them. I punched the middle button, knowing I'd probably find food for my soul there...the University's NPR channel. Their FM channel is mostly classical, most of the day.

Instantly the sound of a violin began to relieve the tense muscles. I was quite surprised later to find it was a Russian orchestra playing Tchaikovsky...a much softer number than I've heard from his pen. I was close to home when a classical guitar began to play, the favorite instrument for my husband and son to hear on this channel.

The music started me thinking of my introduction to classical music, in early elementary school. It was all about listening to a record and taking a test. Yuk...it made me afraid of classical records for years! I honestly thought to enjoy the music, I had to know everything about the technical aspects so I basically avoided it until my late teens when I began to develop a little more appreciation. It wasn't until my daughter began to play the violin that I truly came to enjoy it (although not in the first few weeks of her classes...ouch!).

I have since learned to appreciate classical music just the same as any genre, by listening to recordings and realizing there are some I love and others I...don't. I began to purchase tapes and later CDs of Handel, Bach, Vivaldi, Beethoven, etc., and recordings that included a variety of composers. After awhile, I came to recognize favorites by each composer; Handel's Water Music, Vivaldi's Four Seasons, Bach's Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring, Beethoven's Hymn to Joy (aka: Joyful, Joyful We Adore Thee)...just to name a few.

I truly love all kinds of music including the country and western of my childhood, the California sound and then the British Invasion of my teenage years, the romantic ballads of the 40s and 50s my older siblings enjoyed, the 50s Bebop sound my sister's loved, show tunes, movie scores, the Contemporary Christian music which was just beginning during my Jesus People days, the old Hymns, some kinds of jazz and "Blues"...all kinds of wonderful music.

However, around Christmas...when I hear the beginning sounds of Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring...I always think that this must be the music of the angels. If it is possible at the time, I stop what I am doing, shut my eyes...and let my soul absorb the beauty.

My daughter's wedding and reception is somewhat a blur as I was not feeling well that year. (That's the year I homeschooled from the sofa.) It was before I began taking the insulin, which literally brought life back to me. However, I always think back to the musicians she had playing at her wedding and reception and the extra layer of magic they brought to the special occasion.

I have never officially taught my son anything about classical music beyond CDs like Beethoven Lives Upstairs. However, I smile when I get in the car in the early morning...after he has driven it the night before...and find he was listening to the University's channel on the way home to relax and unwind after a busy day.

There are readers who were raised on the genre and perhaps have music degrees. I'm certain there are others who are like I was when I didn't know Bach from Beethoven. As with learning anything in this world, ask questions...read...purchase a CD (many are very inexpensive) or check them out at the local library.

I was introduced to Yo-Yo Ma by watching Mr. Rogers with my kids so it was an easy choice to purchase one of his CDs. He continues to be a favorite in this household. I learned about The Four Seasons many years ago by watching the credits at the end of a news-type talk show to find out what that beautiful music was they played at the beginning and end of each show. I found many unexpected favorites by listening to Classical Christmas CDs.

I like the way many homeschoolers introduce classical music to their family...one musician at a time. Perhaps Tchaikovsky or Handel around Christmas, Strauss makes me think of Spring weddings, Bach the month of Easter, etc. The music is played in the home as one goes about their day to day work and play.

My knowledge of classical music is so limited, I was actually hesitant to write about it. However, it has brought such...joy...peace...relaxation...and absolute delight...that I so wanted to encourage those who have not made it part of their lives to do so.

I also encourage (please) those who are more knowledgeable to share favorites which would be written on a slip of paper, tucked in my purse and taken with me to the library or music store. For after all these years, I am but a novice...

Now I will brew a new tea I recently found...Constant Comment Green...turn on the CD player...locate my latest novel...and really, really relax.

Thoughts on music and technology

Last night I enjoyed very much finishing my work of the day and being able to curl up on my living room sofa, book in hand, throw over legs, cat on the throw and headphones on ears. I figured that was enough to deal with so tea was taken before settling down (shared with my husband).

I was thoroughly enjoying the music when my thoughts (for some reason) went to the movie Persuasion, which is one of my very favorites. I was thinking of the music on that film and how it was always played in person. Only those who had money and access to great music could enjoy it.

I don't know why we don't stop and think about the miracle of technology more often. Here I was, in the privacy and comfort of my living room, listening to the London Philharmonic Orchestra played on a $1.00 Target CD and an inexpensive Walkman. Yet, the sound was similar to those orchestras I have enjoyed listening to in person. While not the surround sound of the theater, it was still very good. Perhaps I could even get the nuances of the instruments even more on CD. When you stop to think, in the entire history of the world, we've had technology for about...five minutes...what we take for granted could not be comprehended in the days of Jane Austin.

I don't think I was rushing the season, pulling out the CD holder that contains my Target music. These include Winter Themes For Winter Days as mentioned above, a collection of beautiful symphonic music from Christmas inspired symphonies. I also had purchased Christmas in New England, Saint James Choir of Angels, St. James Holiday Chorale and Christmas with the St. James Harp Quartet. The latter three all having choral music from an Old English perspective and all costing $1.00 each (talk about a bargain).

I have a nice collection of other Christmas CD's containing classical, instrumental and more familiar songs and carols. They will be pulled out and enjoyed when I start Holiday baking and throughout the month of December. I'm not sure why this Old English music appeals to me. I have faint memories from childhood, most likely when the three available TV stations played wonderful Christmas specials which included this kind of music, as well as Perry Como, Andy Williams and the other crooners.

I have often thought that the music of our youth is the soundtrack of our life. Which is why John Denver can still make me happy and my nearly 60 year old husband starts dancing around the kitchen when Help Me Rhonda is played (or any other Beach Boys song). It is in those moments when the seven year age difference become apparent. His songs were already oldies by the time I was in high school. Although, having much older brothers and sisters, I could relate to the music of the late 40s and all the 50s, which is probably why I still love the crooners. I'm certain they were played in our home when I was a preschooler.

It is also why Amarillo by Morning is the ring tone on my cell phone. I have such a fondness for some types of country music (especially all those having to do with the West, Texas, and cowboys) that I have watched George Straight in Pure Country about uh...six times. The songs of my childhood, the music loved by my mother and father (who passed suddenly when I was only ten). This is the music I heard in the crib!

How thankful I am to be born at a time of history when technology allows the London Philharmonic to be in my very small living room.