|The front door to my daughter's home|
When my daughter suggested we come out to New England to coincide with the week in May that Brimfield is going on, my first thought was a definite "I cannot do it!". Travel is difficult under any circumstances but May is pretty much the worst time to leave home. (With the probable exception of Mid-Winter in New England.)
I already had too much to do. The garden is always a priority around Mother's Day. I don't feel well. My husband would have to take his food and supplements. I was in the midst of tweaking insulin as it was. Just. Too. Hard. To. Travel.
I can handle my challenges best when in my own house and my own routine. Leave it? I don't think so.
But the more I thought of spending time with my family, seeing how much the grandchildren have grown in the past year, being there for the annual Mother's Day lobster feast with my son-in-law's parents (whom we care for very much), and not the least... a trip to Brimfield... I ended up saying Yes!
Yes is usually good even if it is not easy.
There are many reasons to resist saying yes to life. The obvious reasons can include health and finances (or lack thereof), having small children to care for, having an ill or elderly person to care for, work responsibilities, overcommitment with activities that do not make your heart sing, and dozens upon dozens of circumstances which makes coming to yes... difficult.
But at this stage of life I think many of the times I either delay saying Yes! or spout an immediate No! is due to fear. It is human nature to fear any change but especially if your circumstances are challenging. You just plain need easy. You need simple. You certainly don't need any more complications.
Yes brings with it change and challenges all its' own!
But the best things in life have come as I said Yes! Accepting Jesus as Savior. When my (now) husband asked me to marry him. When the doctor suggested surgery to carry a baby full term. Buying this house and moving to the country.
But not just the big stuff of life, either.
- Deciding to build a raised bed garden many years ago when I already tired easy and then finding my work-rest-work-rest way of gardening resulted in excellent results.
- Saying Yes! to adopting two sister kitties from the same litter and then later agreeing to adopt a Maine Coon from a family at church.
- Writing just because I have to write.
- Making Art to just enjoy the process.
- The last minute Yes! when my son invites me to lunch or a friend to coffee even when it means setting aside my plans for that day.
- Saying Yes! to listening to a Podcast or music and no to the television at times... or saying Yes! to opening the window and listening to the birds as their song fills the quiet room.
However, I often recall when I was praying about a decision to be made and heard, in the depth of that still small Voice, Him tell me to never ever never make a decision based on fear. And truthfully many times I say no because I am afraid of what Yes! will bring with it.
I think that uncertainty that comes with saying Yes! to life will be with me until I go to my Eternal Home. Where all is perfect and there is no reason to fear. It just comes with being human so we have to give ourselves some grace and at the same time think about saying Yes! more often to the good things of life. Even when they are inconvenient.
Is my garden late this year? Most definitely. Are there sections of landscaping that now contain knee high weeds which will be a challenge to clear? You betcha!
But was saying Yes! to living worth it? A million times over.