Thursday, December 06, 2007

Could use your prayer

I'm going through somewhat of a crisis here at home. It's always difficult when one deals with unexpected news but even more during the Christmas season. I'm trying my best to spend time in prayer and continue on making our home festive for the guys (and Sasha). :)

I appreciated listening to Beth Moore's teaching on Wednesdays With Beth (Life Today, James Robison's show) yesterday. She mentioned just having come through a serious trial and appreciating the fact such times draws us closer to God because we have to cling to Him for answers.

I've been experiencing some health problems (all most likely the result of my not going to the doctor because I am uninsured... the county clinic keeps pushing back my appointment... hopefully I will be able to get in the last week of December), my husband's health was worse this year, I still miss my cat, and yesterday we received the news that our mortgage is going up by hundreds of dollars each month for the next year... a small amount due to property tax increases, mostly because of the part-time work my husband and I did this past year.

Our mortgage is through the government because of his Disability. We tried to fight the decision, explaining that the amount they are raising our mortgage is about what we MADE last year. My husband explained that the amount they are raising our mortgage by is what we use for food. However, we have learned that government rules often make little sense. (Like the fact they took away our insurance when my husband was placed on a medical disability...???).

I am only sharing this because I get so curious when people say they are going through a crisis and then don't share what it is. I know there are those who are in so much worse situations than us. I think so often of my friend who lost her husband and her married son in a fiery car accident a few years ago. I think of the family in our community who lost two of their children when their van was hit by a drunk driver. What a world we live in when Christmas shoppers are gunned down at the mall.

I know there are readers of this blog who are facing their own crisis. I love to receive your e-mails, to be able to pray for you and encourage you that God really is in control. I started reading a book last night, one I had purchased at a recent library sale. It is by Stu Webber called Spirit Warriors, a Soldier Looks at Spiritual Warfare. I have skimmed through a couple of his books before, he writes mostly for men but this book is written for men and women( recommended by Dennis Rainey). It's interesting how this book came to me at such a time as this. God didn't stop the crisis but He did give me a wonderful teacher... a pastor and former soldier who understands what it is like to be in the trenches. I'm only a quarter of the way through it but I have already found great peace (and understanding).

Yes... I have been through similar crisis before. None of us can reach our fifties without having battle scars. (Frankly, in this day and age, I know of some five year olds with such scars!) As Pastor Weber reminds us, we are in the midst of the war of the ages... the Universal war between good and evil. We have an Enemy.

I believe that's why so many of us love a good Story... one where the Hero battles for us and Good overcomes Evil. I am thankful that even though physically I feel so weak at times, I have a very strong King and his might Warrior Angels. I'm thankful that my God can supply all my needs according to His riches in Glory. It is through my weakness that He shows His strength.

It has been difficult this past year at times. My husband's illness affects his emotions and I've had to learn all over again to show mercy and compassion to one who can be challenging to live with during those seasons (as I shared with my friend, Linda... my husband is my ministry). My son is a great young man but is still "in training". I'm certain God feels the same way about me, shaking His head and thinking how challenging I can be and reminding Himself that I am still a pilgrim going through this world... one that is in training for Eternity.

I always have to remember that people are not the enemy. Not my husband, not the people at the USDA, not the appointment desk at the clinic, not the crazy drivers on the By Pass or the cranky cashiers at the store (I TRY not to be!). That's what the enemy of our souls wants us to do, to get upset with each other rather than come together in agreement that God has everything under control.

So please, when you are saying your prayers today, I'd appreciate a prayer for my family. I also can share an answer to prayer! This week we received the title to a beautiful used car, a gift from my son-in-law's parents. We are making the decision this week if we're going to just use this car or try to keep it and our aged Dodge. Regardless... we are so thankful and excited for this gift.

On this side of Eternity, we can never understand the road God allows us to travel. We have His promises to hold closely to us. I truly believe (without a doubt) that it is in the trials of life that we grow into the people He wants us to become. I've decided never to waste a trial. I long ago decided, too, that I must live my life the opposite of what the enemy would expect. So... last night I made a delicious dinner for the guys of slow cooked chuck roast with mushroom gravy, homemade mashed potatoes, mixed veggies, and a Kentucky Derby Pie. Today I may just tweak the Christmas decorations and send out the Christmas cards to my husband's elderly aunts.

Life of beauty... in the midst of the storms...

28 comments:

Tyna said...

Brenda, my heart is heavy for you, but praying for our Lord's blessings and peace...

Sheri said...

Brenda, I hope things get better .
God Bless.
Sheri

Heather L. said...

Dear Bredna, I will be praying for you. I really liked what you said about "not wasting a trial."

On a happy note, yesterday I got out shopping for the first time since my illness this summer! My husband took me, and pushed me in a wheelchair, but it was shopping!!!! And I even made it to Goodwill. I didn't find anything there, but it was still so fun to look after hearing of others' trips for so many months.

Kristi in the Western Reserve said...

Dear Brenda, I am keeping you and your family in my prayers. You need some traveling mercies on your journey through life! Maybe your part-time job is not worthwhile for you. What you describe seems terribly unfair. Is there a differnet agency that could help you figure this out? After two years your husband should have medicare...But what can help you? A social worker should come up with some ideas, I would have thought....I know you are doing all you can, and I will just keep on praying for you all...Please keep me in your prayers too, for this first Christmas without Paul.

Mrs. Kay said...

Oh dear...I'm pretty new to your blog and have linked you. I will definitely put you in the spiral prayer journal. I think some may choose not to disclose their crises due to not wanting 'advice'? I'm not sure. I'll be praying.

Susan P. said...

Dearest Brenda, you and your family are on my heart and in my prayers. Much love, Susan P.

Lindsey @ Enjoythejourney said...

Brenda, I have prayed for you already. Hang in there and cling to Him. I will continue to pray for peace & comfort (and a big raise or a drop in mortgage!)

Daffodil Hill said...

Praying for you. {{hugs}}

Sara said...

Dear Brenda, I am adding you and your family to my prayer list today. May He continue to strengthen and uphold you and fill you with His peace; guide you and supply your every need.

Haus Frau said...

Brenda ~ I'm praying right now. <><

Elizabeth said...

Dear Brenda,
My prayers are with you.
Hugs,
Elizabeth

DebD said...

Brenda, you continue to be in my prayers.

Vee ~ A Haven for Vee said...

You and yours are certainly in my prayers.

My mother would nod her head to read your comments about coping with one whose moods are affected by illness and about having a husband who is your ministry. I'll have to point your blog out to her as I think that she would find it as encouraging as I do.

There are answers. The Lord will come through. He always does.

Leeann said...

Hello - I have enjoyed your blog and wanted to tell you that I will be praying for you. I, too, have gone through a trying year but God has been faithful, as always, and shown mercy to me and my family. Please drop my blog anytime.

Sandra said...

Brenda, I'm so sorry to hear that you're facing some hard times. I will keep you in my prayers.

Your blog has always been an encouragement to me and I pray that you are now encouraged to hold onto God who really nows what we need and when we need it.

Lots of hugs, too!

diana said...

Brenda, As many others have said here you are in my prayers and you have been a source of inspiration to me. If your husband is on disability , I would think he should qualify for medicare within 2 yrs of that as well..Check the CMS website. I don't know if you would qualify , but I also heard something about proposed help for the mortgage issues, but it is very specific on how / who / when ..Good luck with that. Call the clinic daily and see if they can work you in or let you replace a sudden vacant appt. Good luck. I'll keep reading, sipping my tea or coffee and hoping the best for you

Patty said...

Keeping you in my prayers, there is nothing too difficult for the Lord

Kelli said...

Dear Brenda,
I will be praying for you.
(((hugs)))
Kelli

She'sSewPretty said...

Brenda,
I don't know what to say other than I pray the year ahead will be better for you. Please email me. I may have some extra diabetic supplies that I can send you. I know how expensive it can be without health insurance.

Rebecca said...

Just found your blog. I pray for God's peace and wisdom for you in this time. And I'm so sorry to hear about your precious kitty. Pets are such a wonderful gift from God I think.

We too are going thru a great trial right now, with family members disowning us. Crazy I know. But I wanted to say that I like what you said about "not wasting a trial". Very good thing to keep in my mind. Thank you!

Anonymous said...

I'm with you in the trenches.
joanna ((())) hugs...

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry you're having such a rough time. You are such a lovely person, and I so enjoy the Godly wisdom I find in your writings. Will be praying for you. I, too, am going to ponder on your comment about not wasting a trial.
Nita in SC

Anonymous said...

Dear Brenda, I will be praying for you during this difficult time! I'm so thankful we have a loving, kind, omnipotent God!
Praying for you,
Your Minnesota friend, Shelley

Anonymous said...

Brenda, you are such a good writer. Your posts express honesty, as well as hope, and this encourages all of us. I love that God tells us Jesus is the Prince of Peace (Isa. 9:6), one of the best things to remember in this season. I'm praying for you and will look for all the good answers to come. Desert Lady

Beverly said...

Brenda, I read your blog but am sorry to say that I have only commented a couple of times. I just wanted you to know that after I read your post, I stopped and prayed for you, and will continue to do so. You are a lovely Titus 2 woman, and I do pray that things will get better financially. I was disgruntled that our mortgage had gone up because of increased property taxes, but I am ashamed of complaining when I read the magnitude of your increase. God bless - Beverly

Anonymous said...

Brenda, you and your family are in my prayers each day. I come to your grace-filled blog daily and feel grateful and blessed to receive just the inspiration and hope that I needed on that day. Thank you for your honest sharing of your problems in such a graceful manner. You are such an amazing example to me and others.

Barb
aka Book of Days

Cathy said...

Brenda,
I'm praying for you that God will meet all your needs. I'm sorry you are still sick and also pray for your healing. Try to stay inside, I remember you had to go out in the cold. This life can be very stressful and we just have to trust the Lord to take care of us. God bless you and your family.

Jenn V said...

My goodness...you have so many ladies covering you with prayer but it can never hurt to have one more. I am adding you to my prayer list as well. I am so sorry for the problems you are facing, but thankful that your God is much bigger and that you trust in Him to see you through.

Blessings,
Jenn V