Actually, I'm just a tad over the actual decade birthday but not by much. Today I found myself thinking how fifty just doesn't fit in the usual scheme of the ages.
Perhaps it is because for centuries 50 was actually old. Life expectancy didn't even reach fifty in some centuries! Now we have people often living into their 80s and 90s so where does that leave 50? I guess it is just the extended middle age that begins when one turns 40 or does 40 now fit more with 30?
I was just getting used to having a daughter out of high school when she graduated college. Then there was the usual marriage and along came grandchildren. They're all quite young (as you can tell from those gorgeous pictures I posted in the past two days) so Grammie is a beloved but fairly new title I wear with pride.
What brought about this wrestling with something so, uh...strange? I had to make a quick trip to the store today for a bottle of Simple Green (just so you will know in the future, it is found in the car wash section of the super store and not the aisle with other cleaners where I looked "forever"). You see, it was one of those "mom trips" because Christopher needed to soak the paint off of some of his Axis and Allies guys and he found out online this is what works.
That little trip sent me down memory lane because I remember my mother in law loving the stuff and encouraging all of us to use it for household cleaning waaaay back when we were all thinking green originally (in my youth). Then while I was at the store, they started playing a Linda Ronstadt song (Different Drum, back when she was with the Stone Poneys) which also took me back to that same decade. Go figure...
The world has changed so much since then. When I was in my teens, women still dressed like the picture above. (If you don't believe me, watch the old TV shows where Wally and the Beaver are in suits and ties because they are going out to eat or to a birthday party.) Clothing has changed a great deal since that era. Christopher was telling me about seeing girls on campus recently dressed as French maids and asked if they sold such things when I was young. I told him you had to order them from Frederick's of Hollywood, the package probably came wrapped in anonymous brown paper, and you would have been arrested if you wore them outside!
All of this thinking today has me wondering if other people feel like they are strangers in this world. It is becoming so different than what I knew even a decade ago. Oh, I know older people have talked about the "good old days" for a very long time. I remember reading an essay about that very subject written in the time of Ancient Greece! No, it is different now for everything is changing so fast.
Of course, we were warned about this in such books as Future Shock. It just seems life around us is out of control and decisions are being made (out of our hands) that are taking us to a place many of us don't want to go... into a future that looks far different than our youth. Not that it was perfect but it was good. Perhaps that is also why 50 seems to wear like a poorly made blouse. It isn't my age that doesn't fit, it is the age in which I find myself living... sigh.
I think I'm going back to brew some tea, go back to a great novel, and be happy at least I have control over my home and my little part of this world. I'm not certain if this makes any sense to you all or if it is just between my lips to God's ears. :)