Monday, February 19, 2007

You call this overprotecting?

I had to go "into town" today because we were out of cream for my morning coffee. I was resorting to fake, powdered chemicals, and it wasn't pretty. So...my son and I took advantage of a sunny morning to have a quick lunch at McDonald's (talk about chemicals and such but at least the salt and fat are tasty).

Somehow the conversation came around to drugs and alcohol at parties and friendships...and how they all relate. He could only recall being at one party where he knew without a doubt someone was on a "drug", because he could smell the aroma of the...uh...ciggy. My husband served two tours of duty in Viet Nam and has always told us one never forgets that particular aroma.

What got me thinking was this...how many seventeen year old boys can say they haven't been to parties with drugs and alcohol at least somewhere in a back room? Oh, there have been plenty of LAN parties where there was objectionable language (and these were Christians) but these guys only overdose on Mountain Dew.

I've been accused of overprotecting both of my children at times. Mainly because I monitored their media, who were their friends, and I wanted to know where they were and if they were coming home late. Horrible mother, terrible, call Family Services! That was even before we made the decision to homeschool Christopher!

What I find amusing is how NOT overprotective I am in many areas. My son's best friends for years (and as close as brothers) are liberal Jews. Another good friend is a Hindu. He does have one Christian in his best friends circle...the one that had purple hair at one time. These are the people whose parties he attends...without the drugs and other such modern day amenities. I know their parents...good people...moral people.

I'm the only mother I know who knows all the characters in at least one anime because my son and I watched Dragon Ball Z together every evening for a couple of years. I'm familiar enough with a couple of other anime that I can read the title and know what they are about. This came about because my son wanted to watch a couple that were popular so I agreed as long as we could watch them together and discuss them (he must have been around age ten when we started). We agree completely on what seasons were good and what were...not.

I also probably corrupted my children by letting them watch Star Trek in all its genre, Babylon 5, and Star Gate through hundreds of reruns. I'd rather watch a rerun of one of them than a brand new episode of whatever is on TV these days!

There's something about Science Fiction that brings about Possibility in that part of my brain where Story resides. I remember reading Perelandra by C. S. Lewis (second in his Space trilogy) and I could see God's Hand at work on Venus as it had been on Earth before we became The Silent Planet.

Overprotective? If only they knew? I guess I am if overprotective means I must be an integral part of their life, that their father and I insist on being an influence on who they know, what they are doing, and what kind of person they are becoming.

I'm overprotective if I do all in my ability to provide an atmosphere that they want to live as Christians and to really know Christ. Not to just let them "make their own decision" ...someday...maybe...about "religion". As if one were deciding between regular Coke and diet Coke and not their eternal future?

To be honest, I like both my kids...the teenager and the one who is raising her own children. I like her husband, too. Neither are perfect by any means but then again, they were raised by imperfect parents. :)

So....this was where my mind had been today as I was chatting with a teenager at McDonald's.

8 comments:

Betty said...

Brenda,
Thank you for your sweet comment on Childhood Memories. Growing up with older parents blessed me to enjoy elderly people from an early age.
Your mother found a special man who I'm sure the Lord had just for her and all of you.
Thanks for sharing with me.......

Senkyoshi said...

Thanks you for your post. I must be overprotective too; however, I like the word parenting better. :) I want my kids to here about the ways of the world from me and know what the Bible says about it instead of hearing it somewhere else with their take on it. By the way, we are Trekkies too! :)

lady laura said...

I was nodding my head as I was reading this post. I am accused of being overprotective too, for the same reasons, and I am proud of it!

I have also watched many a DBZ episode and know most of the characters, we are trekkies, and used to watch Stargate. My son is proud that his mom knows about those things, when so many moms don't have a clue (or an interest) in what their kids are watching, etc. He once bragged to a friend that I knew as much about the Goku saga as he did :)

Susan said...

You just keep right on overprotecting! I'm right there with you. And one of my boys' favorite things to do is watch Star Trek or Stargate with their dad. Even my daughter likes to watch with them (I'm the oddball, but I do like Voyager!)

La Tea Dah said...

Awwwww, our sons would be great friends! I wished you lived nearby. . .

Good job, Mom!

Brenda@CoffeeTeaBooks said...

Yes, I knew about Goku and his saga, too. :)

Candy said...

I think we have to be over protective as parents in this day and age.
One day we will give an account on our parenting too.
Elizabeth George says "There is no greater place of ministry, position or power than that of a mother"
Hugs to you for another great post :)

Mrs. Darling said...

When Wendy was a teenager i kept track of all her friends. She went through a time of rebellion and during that time she left her list of friends phone nuumbers n the kitchen counter and I copied them all. Every car that would come to pick her up I would write down their license plate number. I'm not sure there is such a thing as overprotective. Sounds like you and your kids have a grear relationship.