“If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world.”
This year I have gone from being excited about Christmas to feeling completely depressed... all in the same hour. When we were experiencing a week of early snowfall, I was ready to pull out the Christmas decorations early and here it is the first of December and I can't get enough Christmas spirit to put up the tree.
I will, though. Probably on Monday. I have learned through the years that it is wise not to force the Christmas cheer on myself when I have lost my ho ho ho. I mean, really... I don't want to be Scrooge but on the other hand... why mask the feelings of a little Holiday blues. They are also a part of the season for a lot of people.
When I make out my Holiday list each year of things I want to accomplish (see last week's Sunday Afternoon Tea post), it shows the reality of changing circumstances that come with the passing of the years. Much like the winter snowflakes, no two Christmas seasons are the same.
There are years that have been completely wonderful from Thanksgiving to New Year's Eve. There were years when smiles had to be forced for such things as illness, death of loved ones, or job losses do not take a vacation because it is the month of December. I have found that most Christmas seasons have fallen in the middle with both joy and challenges occurring at the same time.
Earlier this week, I was listening to a program on television about C. S. Lewis and the above quote was discussed. I have long loved that quote but I thought of it anew this year from the perspective of the Holiday season. How easy it is this time of year to realize the reality that Christmas can be enjoyable but it will always leave us short of our expectations.
I think it is this... I associate the Christmas season as the closest thing to Heaven this side of Eternity. I love the lights and the sparkle and the joy of giving. I especially love how the most secular of programs proclaim the birth of Jesus in the form of Christmas carols. I can think of no other time of the year when Jesus is announced as often in secular media.
Is it any wonder that our emotions can become a roller coaster in December for we are seeing glimpses of what Eternity will be like one day and just as suddenly we are brought back to the reality of living in a fallen world.
How does one fight the good fight this time of year? How can I stop comparing what is now to what will only be found Someday? I'm still working on that answer, especially as I am making a list and checking it twice... and three times... and four times... etcetera.
Well, just as I wrote last week, I am working out priorities for both time and my budget. I have enjoyed some old favorite Hallmark Christmas movies in November and while I will still watch a few here and there, once I get into December I turn my attention to the music of Christmas.
I will reread two or three favorite Christmas books. I took Nigel Slater's beautiful Christmas Chronicles off the shelf to continue reading this year. I had to stop due to eye troubles last December. Reading small print is a challenge but overall, reading is much more doable since the surgery.
I am also going to listen to the Christmas Chronicles podcast this year... all of it this time. Rumor is that the podcast is available again this year. Slater is quite secular but oh my, his writing reminds me of the beauty found not only in Christmas but during the season of winter.
I have a doctor's appointment this week and while I am on that side of town, I plan to stop by Barnes & Noble to peruse Christmas issues of British magazines and have a cup of coffee. There is something about that store during the Holidays that brings joy to my soul. Could it be the combination of sparkle, books, and caffeine? Could be...
A simple item crossed off my list already was to dry orange slices to use as decorations. My home had a slight aroma of orange all day yesterday as they were drying on the lowest temperature in my oven. They are now ready for when I do finally decorate.
I will think of two or three "must do" items for Christmas 2019. I think they will most likely have something to do with food. Whether at home or at a restaurant... time will tell.
One thing I do know this Christmas, I appreciate the blog friends I have made throughout the years. Someday we will be in that other world that Lewis writes about and there we will meet face to face as long time old friends.
I hope you find your sparkle this week.
Mentioned in this Blog Post
The book Christmas Chronicles... info here.
The podcast Christmas Chronicles... info here to listen online. It can also be downloaded wherever you find podcasts.
Image: Winter Scene