Getting spiritually and emotionally ready for the holidays

I began talking a bit about the upcoming Holidays yesterday. I want to share a little each day this week about how I learned to love this time of year and how to not end up being frustrated and feeling empty at the end of December.

I mentioned that a former pastor used to preach a lot about the challenges the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays can bring to family situations. It does seem that our emotions can run so high this time of year. Here are some of the challenges I found we faced in past years.

First, by noticing who is not at the table each year. I always miss my daughter and her family but we can talk over the phone and through the Internet. I miss my mother more this time of year than any other. I can get so emotional that when I walk into her favorite restaurant (a cafeteria which serves the best Midwestern comfort food), I have to fight the tears.

Yet, I "lost" my mother long before her death at age eighty-five. She became a different person as she reached about the late 70s in age. She was no longer the "Mamaw" we loved so much. By the time her physical body passed away, her mind and emotions had long been changed. I have also lost two brothers and two sisters in the past few years. Time goes on but life is different without them. This is my current challenge, one I bring before the Lord at this time of year the most...the empty places at the table.

Second, as we face challenges by spending time with people who frustrate us during the Holidays. We spent every Thanksgiving and Easter with my in-laws. While I truly did love them, our relationship was very uncomfortable most of the time. This began long before my husband and I married, as a result of his being raised in a very critical environment. It was no surprise that they often found fault with me, too. So we always entered their house during the Holidays, wondering what would face us this year. However, even then I knew it was important that my children have a relationship with their grandparents and they were very good to each of them. Since both my in-laws have passed on, I am glad their grandchildren have pleasant memories of Holidays spent at Grandma's house.

Third, my heart goes out to the families split apart by divorce. My own father passed away when I was a child and I dealt with two different stepfathers and step families. However, I have not had to deal with the challenge as a mother. It has to be the most difficult of decisions as each year the children are divided between parents and grandparents of different families. My heart (and prayers) goes out to each that will be dealing with this soon.

The fourth challenge this time of year is when we have family activities with those who do not understand our walk with Christ, whether it is from an unbeliever's standpoint or denominational walls that divide (something I have never understood). Both can be frustrating, especially when challenged during Holiday gatherings.

Finally, the fifth challenge which many of us face, when we are entering the Holidays during a very lean financial year. I'll talk more about that tomorrow...

So why bring up these challenges now? So I can remind you to begin praying for those which you will face starting today. Pray for each individual, each situation, each family or social gathering and asked the Lord to guard your mouth and give you wisdom. (I sometimes need spiritual duct tape!) He understands, I mean really...have you read the Word all the way through? There were some interesting family and social gatherings mentioned there that make ours look like a cake walk.

I personally need to draw close to Him as I mourn those not at the table, those who I may have not seen every Thanksgiving or Christmas but at least there was the possibility of getting together (as we lived in different parts of the country).

I also have friends that I miss, who always made Christmas special. There have been years when everything seemed "just right" but they have been far and few between. I am so thankful I've found a way to make Christmas special each year. More to come...